A While ago, an acquaintance said to me, “Oh I am so sorry to hear about your losses. If you want to scream and get upset you should do it.” I listened but only nodded my head. “If you want scream, you can scream at me it will make you feel better. Yell at me if you like,” she continued.
Her words initially felt good and justified the feelings I had on the surface because my day was not going that good and emotions of self-pity were flooding over me. Tempted to follow her instructions and scream to the top of my lungs, I had to hold back because my heart wanted it so badly.
“Why did all this bad stuff happen to me?” My best friend which was my mom passed away, a week later my lovely little black terripoo died, and lastly, my dear dauschaund had to be put down. All of this death occurred in less than a year. Each one an integral part of my life, since we moved to Vancouver together, and in every way, the three of them strengthened me. I lost the life that I once had, and within a year everything in my life was so different.
An attack from the devil, I don’t know, because death occurs to every creature on God’s Earth. However, I told myself to be angry like my friend told me. I wanted to feel anger and sorrow and take it out on anyone that came into the office smiling and happy. If I was not happy, why should they be happy? Everyone should wallow in my pain; it is only right.
I fought these emotions, however, because it was no one’s fault that the three of them left me. The fall of Adam caused trials, tribulations, and death to come upon everything in the world. Do I feel that God is punishing me? No, God is good, and life happens. When my faith is most tested, I am learning to hold firm to God’s word, and I encourage you to do the same. All things work themselves out, and good comes although it does not appear anything enjoyable can every happen again.
“Am I out of God’s will?” I ask myself. I don’t think so because my heart does not convict me; so I will not allow anyone to tell me this is true, and neither should you when trials come against you.
1st John 21-22 tells me, “21 Dear friends, if our hearts do not condemn us, we have confidence before God 22 and receive from him anything we ask, because we keep his commands and do what pleases him.”
So I believe in God’s comfort regardless of what people try to tell me. Remember when you ask God and follow his guidance, He will lead you to where you to be. Bad things might come upon you, and you will hear discouraging words from others, but please let those words fall upon deaf ears and trust in God.
God has given me a supernatural peace beyond understanding to accept their deaths, and when I start to grow depressed, I fall back on the word of God.
John 14: 27 ”Peace I leave with you; my peace I give you. I do not give to you as the world gives. Do not let your hearts be troubled and do not be afraid.”
The world gives me peace when everything around me looks rosy and going my way. However, in the times of bleakness, I have to draw on the word of God for comfort. God is true to His word, and the peace He provides fills my heart so that I can continue to encourage others through my stories of faith and trust in Him. I have been there. I know that regardless of how the circumstances appear, He is with me, comforting me.
Hebrews 13: 5 tells me to be content, “….Never will I leave you; never will I forsake you.”
Therefore I want to tell everyone, that God is faithful. When trails come to you, let his love fill your heart, and he will give you a supernatural peace beyond any understanding. Yes, it hurts, but not as bad when God’s love overshadows you; he helps you to go on. When you believe in him, you do not need to depend upon the world’s ways of giving peace.
I am blessed, and although God can never replace my dear mother, he did give me a wonderful husband, and a beautiful little puppy. I call her Tomixena, and she is very precious to me. She is very loving, has a wonderful personality, and loves cuddles. I have given her a page on my website. Meet Tomi